Last night, at 11:59, I was standing in my friend Ronnie's living room - pantsless - with around 30 other people - also pantsless - the band Warrior Princess - also also pantsless - counting down to midnight over a PA. We were all soaked, basting in our own juices (the Kentaros had just finished their set), each with our own unique aromas. For some, alcohol; for others, weed. For everyone, tobacco (it's a smoking-allowed venue). At precisely midnight, Warrior Princess / The Internal Organ set off a mind-bendingly raucous set lasting till past one. As soon as the music finished, we burst forth through the front door, whooping and panting, into the forty-degree night - pantsless. Steam billowed from our bodies, while simultaneously our flesh prickled with the biting cold of the winter air. I returned inside soon thereafter, re-robed and packed up my things. Kevin - bassist, trombonist, accordionist, and songwriter for Warrior Princess - is a long time friend of mine, with our first meeting being during preschool, around age 2. He and I rode around the block a few times on mine and Ronnie's bikes, and then made the last one a race in our highest gears (mine 50 - 11, his something slightly less).zi won, but not by much. It was heartening, I suppose. Kevin is very fit, 4 inches taller than me, and a much more experienced cyclist. But it may also have been nothing special, and I just assume he's a better cyclist than me for no good reason. That's the mental portion of the sport, I guess. It was my very first race - a single lap criterium in a high gear with an old friend of mine, at 1:30 in the morning on New Year's Day. But enough drivel, let's get to some hard-hitting whatever it is I should be putting here.
Among the many traditions for ringing in each year and kicking to the curb the year we've just completed, traditions that include vomiting, going to jail, and shouting obscenities before falling off your porch, there is one particular tradition that has continued to mask itself in a virtuous cloud, while underneath there is really not much more than a corrupted and commercialized concept more ritual than tradition. I am speaking, of course, of the "new year's resolution." Resolutions are not things that should be made out of tradition, happenstance, or while inebriated, a triumvirate of potential failure and disillusionment emblazoned across the chest of the new year's resolution concept. Most often, these are half-hearted, if indeed hearted at all, and if anything give people an excuse to let themselves down, because, as they rationalize, there's always another one. Another chance to commit. Like divorce; if you fail at the marriage deal, there's always another chance to commit to something. But if the world operated in such a way that drinking yourself into oblivion was the best way to commit to something, the divorce rate would be far below what it is today.
This being said, my resolutions are:
1. To spend time each day taking steps to get in better shape: exercising, thinking critically about what I'm putting into my body, getting more restful sleep, and brushing my teeth more than I am wont to do.
2. To care about my performance in school. This past semester, I succeeding in not failing one class - a discussion class that met for two days a week the second half of the semester and involved no assignments. This semester, after a drastic reassessment of my goals, I have a new major, a new outlook, and an easy schedule that doesn't involve getting to a class before 11 o'clock.
3. To organize my workspace. The majority of my failings last semester - and in other areas in my life - can be directly attributed to a lifelong reticence towards organization.
4. To budget. I don't do this. I have $15. And a bamboo catchall with a bunch of nickels in it.
While I may have some serious issues to work at, I'm committed to changing them for my benefit.
Stats, 7:40 pm
weight: 145
food: a box of chicken pot stickers, orange juice, two cans of coke
didn't exercise today
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Day 366
As much as I'd love to, I don't think it's deserved of me to classify myself as a serious cyclist. If anything, I'm an interloper, an outsider with little to no experience looking for a way in.
That being said, I'm intent on changing this. I'm 19, though I didn't actually start riding a bike until this past May, shortly after graduating high school. For college, I'm majoring in French at UT Knoxville, and as a result my excess scholarship money gives me approximately $3000 every semester in the form of a check. After getting my first check in late August, I went out to my favorite LBS (The Bike Zoo) and picked up a new Specialized Allez, threw on a rear rack and some lights, and had a commuting machine. My intent was originally to just have a nice bike that i could reliably use to get from one place to another (my house to college and back). The Allez was the cheapest road bike available, with the bike alone selling for $799+tax, all in all though, with gloves, helmet, rack, patch kit, bottle cage, and lights ended around $1200. With my Allez, I had no idea what I was getting into. Riding quickly became an obsession for me, and if I have nothing to do for any length of time, I'll be on my bike doing something. It seemed natural for me to think about becoming competitive, being that I am innately competitive, am decently fit, and am trying to find a way to maintain my fitness after ending a 13 year career as a dancer.
And that is how I've arrived here. I've been wanting to get more fit for a long time now, but especially since I started modeling. Since I was 5, I have been a dancer. I started doing simple modern dance at my elementary school, and quickly took to it, and began performing as soon as I could, around age 9. From there I stayed in the magnet program in my public school system to continue dancing, as well as joining outside companies to keep performing. One of my earliest teachers was an incredible man by the name of Mark Lamb. He now lives in New York and is apparently doing really awesome things on the scene there with his company Mark Lamb Dance. While dancing in his first company, Circle Modern, which he founded here in Knoxville, and while dancing in high school, I came to want nothing more than to dance for the rest of my life. Unfortunately I came to experience one of the most commonly expressed sentiment about college: it's too expensive. While being accepted as a dance major undergrad at Ohio State after their first audition, in addition to receiving TWELVE THOUSAND dollars in scholarships per year from OSU, it would still cost me ~$19,000/year to attend. Similar situations occurred in my attempts to attend various other schools, and it all stemmed from the fact that I was an out of state student, and therefore my coming into the state was heinous enough to warrant a $13,000/year fine from any school I attempted to attend. I'm still bitter about this.
And so, I was relegated to the life of a biology major who went to the state university in his home town. Unfortunately, I'm no good at chemistry or studying, so I became a french major. And now I need a way to stay fit. So here is where it begins, the day before a new year. Not only do I get to symbolically throw out all my shit from this past year that kept me from actually doing this, but it serves to add another year to my archives, which should enhance my appearance to future visitors. If you're reading this from the future, sorry about that!
My stats for today, December 31, around noon. (I'm 5'9")
Weight: 145
Food: Banana and bowl of oatmeal
Exercise: None yet
Planned Activity: 30 minute bike ride, some body resistance exercise (pilates, push ups, etc.) for 45 minutes. Then partying from around 6 until the wee hours of the new year.
That being said, I'm intent on changing this. I'm 19, though I didn't actually start riding a bike until this past May, shortly after graduating high school. For college, I'm majoring in French at UT Knoxville, and as a result my excess scholarship money gives me approximately $3000 every semester in the form of a check. After getting my first check in late August, I went out to my favorite LBS (The Bike Zoo) and picked up a new Specialized Allez, threw on a rear rack and some lights, and had a commuting machine. My intent was originally to just have a nice bike that i could reliably use to get from one place to another (my house to college and back). The Allez was the cheapest road bike available, with the bike alone selling for $799+tax, all in all though, with gloves, helmet, rack, patch kit, bottle cage, and lights ended around $1200. With my Allez, I had no idea what I was getting into. Riding quickly became an obsession for me, and if I have nothing to do for any length of time, I'll be on my bike doing something. It seemed natural for me to think about becoming competitive, being that I am innately competitive, am decently fit, and am trying to find a way to maintain my fitness after ending a 13 year career as a dancer.
And that is how I've arrived here. I've been wanting to get more fit for a long time now, but especially since I started modeling. Since I was 5, I have been a dancer. I started doing simple modern dance at my elementary school, and quickly took to it, and began performing as soon as I could, around age 9. From there I stayed in the magnet program in my public school system to continue dancing, as well as joining outside companies to keep performing. One of my earliest teachers was an incredible man by the name of Mark Lamb. He now lives in New York and is apparently doing really awesome things on the scene there with his company Mark Lamb Dance. While dancing in his first company, Circle Modern, which he founded here in Knoxville, and while dancing in high school, I came to want nothing more than to dance for the rest of my life. Unfortunately I came to experience one of the most commonly expressed sentiment about college: it's too expensive. While being accepted as a dance major undergrad at Ohio State after their first audition, in addition to receiving TWELVE THOUSAND dollars in scholarships per year from OSU, it would still cost me ~$19,000/year to attend. Similar situations occurred in my attempts to attend various other schools, and it all stemmed from the fact that I was an out of state student, and therefore my coming into the state was heinous enough to warrant a $13,000/year fine from any school I attempted to attend. I'm still bitter about this.
And so, I was relegated to the life of a biology major who went to the state university in his home town. Unfortunately, I'm no good at chemistry or studying, so I became a french major. And now I need a way to stay fit. So here is where it begins, the day before a new year. Not only do I get to symbolically throw out all my shit from this past year that kept me from actually doing this, but it serves to add another year to my archives, which should enhance my appearance to future visitors. If you're reading this from the future, sorry about that!
My stats for today, December 31, around noon. (I'm 5'9")
Weight: 145
Food: Banana and bowl of oatmeal
Exercise: None yet
Planned Activity: 30 minute bike ride, some body resistance exercise (pilates, push ups, etc.) for 45 minutes. Then partying from around 6 until the wee hours of the new year.
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